i realized that i have a selfish way of thinking.
i dont socialize, because i am more comfortable doing my own thing. or doing things that i like to do, or creates my interest level to peak where it involves the things i enjoy doing. but now i have been trying to see what i look like from the third person perspective, and i realize that me not trying to get to know people at the church and just attending and then to leave, is arrogantly foolishly selfish intent. Me not socializing is being inconsiderate of others feelings. When its alone time, that is the time to do things you enjoy doing alone, but when your in a social environment, its expected to be social with people. doing things by yourself in a social atmosphere will only cause discord for your own reputation, and will only hurt your own relationship as a church member and relationship with Christ. because church is more than just a religion of principalities on code of ethics for the denomination of the religion and a relationship with Christ, but it is also to honor the community. Church is community.
I mean it’s not like im not anti social, or i dont have people skills, and im not an introvert either, (i actually dont believe in that stupid categorized label of “introvert/extravert” very black and white judgmental notion, bc really people can be introvert one day and extravert the next day, it all depends on your mood) It’s just i’m an action man, im a doer. I like to make moves, be productive with my time, rather than just sitting around and bojangle.
i have lots of friends, i am a social person only when I want to be or if i am in the mood. i think that’s what made me realize the epiphany i came across from the aforementioned notion. i am only social when i WANT to be. that is pure SELFISH intent!
Like for example, when you go to work, at that point of time, even if you dont like the people or if your feeling grouchy, you have to be social.
being a loner…
i see that doing that is only hurting my own relationship with Christ to be a fully committed brother of Christ, because it is contradicting to the underlying truth of that terminology fact. How can i be a brother of Christ, if i am not a brother to the fellowship of the Church? my point exactly!
i have totally contradicted my walk. and now these eyes see, that i need to start socializing with the communion members of the church, rather than just being a loner and trying to seek God alone, when I should be seeking God together as a corporate motive.
Now i know that fellowship is significantly imperative to help grow the church in the right approach the way Jesus wanted it to be. Through including love, and to not judge, and humble thinking, and selflessness to expect nothing and not want anything for future accounts. to appreciate what’s in front of me.
Please pray for me that I will stop thinking on my own when in a social environment, and start being more considerate about others. it’s going to take a while for improvement on progress, but i pray that someday i will start thinking of others.
“Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment. A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.”