The most biggest thing that makes me livid is when people judge me without taking the time to personally ask me what’s on my mind or what’s going on. Quickly jumping to conclusions and basing judgment from only the outside, misunderstanding my true intent. Making an assumption from their own minds, thinking in their own minds about what I look like from the exterior, rather than going to the source (me) which will conclude the entire synopsis of the topic.
Especially when it’s people who I consider my best friends, family, and even the people I favor the most, the loved ones.
I always thought they did love me, that they got my back, that they would be on my side, but instead after you pour out everything who I am to them, *screech* REJECTION in your face!
Broken hearted, disappointed, a turmoil of feeling misunderstood, and angered.
I’ve faced this plenty in my life. Through elementary school, middle school , highschool, college, young adult life, now.
After years and years of experiencing this over and over. It did make me more cold hearted. And unable to trust people. Also unable to love, or feel loved, because of the wounds and scars I carry from the so called friends and family who I once thought wouldn’t hurt me.
I was wrong.
I felt alone once again.
For once I thought I would have a collective of friends and fam to actually understand me.
But the only person who understands me is Yahweh & Abba.
I started to delve more into knowing the character of them both, and started studying alot about theology, philosophy, psychology, metaphysics, spirituality, aesthetics.
And now it’s clear. I have a great understanding/wisdom from God, to know what’s really going on. Now I am not so hurt as these things happen frequently.
I do not feel so alone anymore. I just understand. And I am loved by Jesus. God is with me.
So this is what I’ve learned. So many people will judge me, but the best way to handle this is to stop caring period.
People will continue to judge, because why?
because, they try to figure you out, because you have this kind of aura that God designed you to be, because you are one of the anointed, but they cant seem to figure you out, so they decide on their own intentions rather than not God’s, to categorize you, so that it makes sense to them.
And when stuff like this happens, they’ll try to put you into a box, and rebuke you on their own intentions rather than ask God of His discernment rather than their owns.
And then they’ll try to shape and mold you into what they want you to be, rather than understand who you are and just let you be you the way God wants you to be.
Perhaps its because they lack the marriage of the bridegroom. Jesus is only an acquaintance in their spirit, when it should be the glue that holds everything together.
And through this gap, it creates arrogance of self knowledge, which is self pride fueling their own mind to think that they are a know it all apologetisist or theologian.
And wants to feel a sense of recognition, because they are insecure. So in order to resolve this issue at hand, is to have a personal relationship with God through the construct activity of prayer worship and meditating on the bread of life. Instead of analyzing every single context of theology.
Because doing that ^ . is only religion.
And Christianity is not a religion. It’s a relationship!
Yea I am at the point where I see all my friends judging me, even my best friends. Everybody is judging me, yes of course I am pissed, who wouldn’t be?
But God told me through meditation.
Just do not care and just do you.
So I will do just that. Because I just hate arguing trying to reason with people to explain to them that they’re wrong, and predicting that their intellect will try to suffice new (useless) information that doesn’t mean anything, but only will try to make their point worthy. It’s contradicting.
And no. It’s not that I’m stubborn nor narrow-minded. It’s the fact that theres no getting through to people who judge.
There’s no point.
So right now I feel a lot better after God told me this.
And now I am not so angered by it. A little disappointed, but on a better side of feeling content, because I understand them now.
Oh and here’s another thing. People only judge, because they only see ONE FACET of you. When in reality, you have almost like 20 other facets of you that they haven’t seen.
It makes perfect sense. For example, your hanging out with your group of friends, but if that one person isn’t their in your circle, then that part of you doesn’t come out, its that one friend that can only make that side of you come out, because he/she knows how to push your buttons.
But if people can only see one side of you, they’re what I call one-dimensional . and it’s not right to quickly jump the gun to judge a person from only one facet.
Even your best friends, they will only know probably 15 facets of you, but what about the other 25%? Those facets almost never come out, because they’re too deep personally. And maybe those facets only come out through Christ.